How to Figure Out What You Really Want

Joanne Bourgault

It’s officially 2017. If you’re not raring to go, if you feel overwhelmed with everything you want to accomplish this year and aren’t sure where to start, if you know you want more for your life but don’t know how to proceed, then I have a solution for you: The Desire Map.

The Desire Map is a book, yes, but it’s so much more than that.

It’s a process for exploring your desires as a way to get to the authentic brilliance of your essence.

What does that even mean?

It means that you need to know YOU. What makes you tick. What lights you up. What gives you ecstasy. What allows you to truly relax and live in the moment. What makes you laugh so hard that you’re afraid you’re going to pee. What makes you, YOU.

If you’re like me, you’ve probably tucked your authentic self away for safe-keeping, having learned during childhood that it hurts to be rejected for liking the wrong things, saying the wrong things, or feeling too much.

But the thing is that in doing so, you’ve disconnected yourself from your feelings, from knowing what you really want, and from being your true self.

And if you want real contentment, well, you need to let your light shine brightlyYou must be yourself.

How many of us have pursued goals – degrees, businesses, projects, jobs, homes, marriages, children – only to find ourselves with a “what now?” feeling?

As Danielle LaPorte, the author of The Desire Map, says,

“We have the procedures of achievement upside down…What if, first, we got clear on how we actually wanted to feel within ourselves, and then we designed our to-do lists?”

This concept – knowing how you want to feel first, and then setting goals – has changed my life.

I have been a type-A, achievement-oriented, perfectionistic, approval-seeking female for as long as I can remember, chasing goals because I want that pat on the head, the nod of approval, the words affirming that I am good enough.

But that hasn’t worked so far.

That’s enough.

Now is my time to shine, and it’s yours, too.

Which means acknowledging that you want to feel GOOD in your life, instead of beating yourself up for not being a perfect mom, wife, friend, boss, employee, neighbour, daughter, sister. (Hint: perfection doesn’t exist.)

It’s time to explore what you want, and then do what makes you feel how you want to feel.

I’m not talking about selling your house and moving to Hawaii (although, that’s a totally valid option, FYI). I’m talking about getting clear about what makes your essence or soul or spirit f*cking sing, and then doing the things that create that inner resonance, like the clang of a gong in your chest.

Listen, no one else is going to make you feel good – at least, not long-term. It’s up to you to take charge of your inner life and build the life of your dreams.

Want to take action? Buy The Desire Map today, or sign up for my newsletter and stay up-to-date on all of my Desire Map events. (2017 Q1 and Q2 schedule coming soon!)